Life in Circles

You can’t control your employer, but you can control the type of employee you are.

You can’t control the family, but you have a lot of influence on the kind of family member you are.

You can’t control your friends in person or on social media, but you have the room to be the kind of friend you want to be.

Stephen Covey’s Circle of Influence is based on the idea that focusing on the things that an individual can control, rather than worrying about the things they cannot, leads to greater productivity, success, and happiness.

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Life Should Look Better on Instagram

Actually, being happier would be a breeze if we weren’t trying so hard to be happier than other people – at least how we perceive them in our minds.

As clinical psychologist Meg Jay points out life should look better on Instagram.

Most feel pretty good about themselves until they compare with others on social media.

It may surprise you but young college students are very aware of the toll Instagram and social media is taking on their psyche and are voluntarily deleting apps (often temporarily) with various degree of success.

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Comparing Yourself

Today, for one day, resist comparing yourself to someone else.

Let it go, don’t think about it a second longer and try something different.

“Don’t compare yourself to other people; compare yourself to who you were yesterday – Jordan Peterson, psychologist.

The only comparison that truly matters.

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Changing Careers

Sometimes it feels like we’re in a rut – but how can you know for sure?

“For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?”  And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

Apple CEO Steve Jobs from his 2005 commencement speech at Stanford

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Risks

Disney CEO Bob Iger told Wall Street Journal reporter Kara Swisher in a 2005 interview — “If someone is going to eat our lunch, it might as well be us”.

This has business repercussions — be bold, take chances and act before someone else gets into your space.

It also has a personal meaning:  be bold, take chances and act before someone else gets into your space.

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35,000 Decisions a Day

That’s what research in the Journal of Health Psychology reveals – lots of little decisions we may not even be aware of and some big ones.

Those who are indecisive get bogged down and overwhelmed.

Decision makers turn out to be the ones who can accept that their decisions could go well or not.

Sometimes it’s just the best choice in the moment.

People with mental health issues or suffer from low esteem find it harder to trust their decisions.

Think of a decision as what works for you not so much whether it is a good or bad decision.

And sometimes having the luxury of time doesn’t make for better choices.

Decision makers don’t wait for perfect — they just act.

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Outsourcing Confidence

You can’t expect to outsource self-confidence by looking to someone else.

Believe in you.

Never look to others for that which you don’t have.

The brain can be retrained – teach it to believe in you.

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Character

“Character is built not in good times, but in bad times” said Apple founder Steve Jobs.

He said this to freshmen at his alma mater Reed College on August 27, 1991 and he knew what he was talking about.

NeXT computers were not selling well and Pixar experienced layoffs.

Adversity is a predictor of your next success because if you persist, it means you really want something and if you keep persisting, you cannot be denied.

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The Most Important Relationship

The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself.

It’s not possible to have healthy relationships with others without having one with you.

People spend so much time obsessing over making friends and very little time accepting and recognizing the one they are having with themselves.

Be the best friend you’ve always wanted.

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Banishing Fear of Failure

No one succeeds all the time – in fact, it is not necessary.

Even Caitlin Clark doesn’t make every basket (an amazing 40% from the three-point range which means this women’s hoops superstar misses from that distance 60% of the time – more than she succeeds).

Since when do we have to feel badly about not succeeding?

Failure is the rehearsal for success.

Because if you do it again, it tells you how badly you want it (and to keep doing it means it’s only a matter of time before you succeed).

There’s a reason we don’t always get what we set out to do – sometimes adversity introduces us to ourselves, to those around us and something we may not have even previously considered.

Today, I’m not going to be so hard on myself – I’ll concentrate more on trying.

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