Anger is scary.

When we’re on the receiving end of it, anger may be scarier still.

“Calm down” doesn’t work.

“It’s not important, it’s not a big deal” seems to make people more enraged.

What we want when we are angry is for someone to listen to us – to hear us out without judging or – and this is important – without giving advice.

Advice just seems to inflame things even more.

But there is also good anger.

This is when we have a right to express our displeasure and to make every attempt to be heard.

Good anger is constructive.

Bad anger is destructive to us and to everyone who comes in contact with it.

The tool for dealing with anger is to become a good, non-judgmental listener.

The means for expressing concerns you have a right to air is to not destroy yourself or your relationship with others in doing so.

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