How to Forgive

Amit Sood is a remarkable man.

A physician at Mayo Clinic, Chair of the Mind and Body Initiaitve and Associate Professor of Medicine.

I have never seen a better case made for forgiving others than Dr. Sood makes in 14 pearls of wisdom.

I am anxious to share my discovery with you.

How to Forgive:

  1. Consider forgiveness a life long process. Quick fixes are not likely to work.
     
  2. It is okay to be selfish in forgiveness.  You forgive because you wish to heal and stop the pain.
     
  3. Broaden your worldview to include imperfections.  Include the existence of evil which we must face in our lives.
     
  4. Try to understand other’s actions.  See things from the other person’s point of view.
     
  5. Consider forgiveness as an opportunity.  Take this as an opportunity to grow rather than hamper your progress.
     
  6. Exercise the privilege to forgive as soon as you recognize the need for it.  Nurture the intention to forgive.
     
  7. Forgive gracefully without creating a burden on the forgiven.  Don’t use forgiveness to advertise that others have been wrong.
     
  8. Forgive before others seek your forgiveness.  Forgiveness is for you not for them.
     
  9. Look forward to forgiving.  Do not consider forgiveness a burden.
     
  10. Extend your forgiveness to what even may transpire in the future.  If you can forgive and accept future annoyances you have inoculated yourself against future suffering. This does not mean you will allow indiscretions.
     
  11. Praying for others increases your ability to forgive them.
     
  12. Prevent future situations where you may have a need to forgive.  Lower expectations, clearly communicate these expectations, keep an attitude of internal acceptance or disappointment if these expectations are not met.
     
  13. Lower your expectations.  Low expectations avert disappointments.
     
  14. Have a low threshold to seek forgiveness that is not just about forgiving someone else. Seek forgiveness from others if you think it is reasonable and might help.

“The weak can never forgive.  Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong” – Mahatma Gandhi

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