Fear Fighters

  • Do the thing you fear to do and the fear will go away from you.
  • Thought to put on repeat: 99% of what most people fear never happens.
  • Fear thoughts are not active until we consciously or subconsciously activate them – you decide.
  • What we fear is almost always worse than reality.

Free from the Stress of Others

  • The mind is like a sponge, when a friend or an employer exposes it to their stress, it becomes our stress.
  • Often people suffer more from the stress handed out by others than that which is generated by themselves.
  • Solution: Train to ask the question what price are you willing to pay for stress and anxiety – deal with the things that you must, throw off the anxiety that others send your way.

Living in the Present

  • Not living 100% in the present and focused on what and who is in front of you is living half your life.
  • When you intentionally focus your attention, you are in charge of your experience.

Better Than Winning the Lottery

  • A Pennsylvania man just won his third lottery – not all winning tickets were for a lot of money but at least one was.
  • He cautioned others not to do what he did because he has a self-confessed gambling addiction.
  • 70% of lottery winners end up broke within 7 years.
  • Winning the lottery can be fun but the evidence shows winning the lottery of gratitude is healthier, safer and rewarding in the way sheer money has proven not to be.

Sidney Poitier on Being Better

  • “I truly, truly try to be better tomorrow than I was today. 
  • And I mean better as simply a better human being, not a better actor, not a better anything, but just a better human being.
  • That will please me well. And, when I die, I will not be afraid of having lived.”

Mood Enhancers

  • There are three things I remind my students of in the final session of each semester. 
  • First, as Mother Theresa said there is more hunger for love than there is for bread. 
  • And a reminder that Viktor Frankl who survived a World War II concentration camp was able to come away with faith in people even under those tremendously challenging circumstances. 
  • Finally, that the road not taken is always the direction of choice regardless of fear or uncertainty.
  • 3 ways to stay positive by choosing to see the upside of life.

Waiting for a Break

  • When that well-earned break finally arrives, don’t be surprised if it makes little difference.
  • Making your own good luck is more focused, urgent and relevant to your situation.
  • To get a break, make a break instead of waiting for something to happen.
  • “No one is going to know or care about your failures, and neither should you. All you have to do is learn from them and those around you. All that matters in business is that you get it right once. Then everyone can tell you how lucky you are.” — Mark Cuban

Loneliness

  • Millennials are described as the loneliest generation followed by Gen Z (30% of millennials say they always and often felt lonely compared to 20% for Gen X and 15% for Baby Boomers).
  • More millennials reported in a survey that they had no acquaintances, friends, close friends or best friends – and this is from a generation connected to their phones and social media.
  • Social isolation ends when the emphasis is placed on fewer but more meaningful friendships in which both sides are equally invested.
  • Mitch Albom says, “The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone.”

Good Looks

  • I was disappointed to hear podcaster and entrepreneur Scott Galloway describe his looks in an unfavorable way the other day – he was brutal about himself.
  • Then I saw a study of males who basically liked themselves younger, taller and thinner than they actually were – I’ll spare you the details, unless you absolutely must.
  • What about personality, heart, conviction, honesty, empathy – where are these attributes at this moment in time?
  • The cheapest improvement to any person’s looks is a smile – we don’t see a lot of them these days but they are irresistible and cheaper than surgery.

Likeability Pills

  • The more you listen, the more people like you (even though many of us think the more we talk, the more they like us).
  • Ask questions – immediately like swallowing a pill – others warm up to people who ask questions.
  • Being in the present is good, but better turns out to be focusing on the other person in the present without distractions or the need to chime in with your opinion.
  • Being likeable is being willing to let the other person do all the talking.