Finally, Something to Make Us Live Longer

A new study – 50,000 women between 69 and 96 – discover that experiencing gratitude is beneficial for both physical and emotional health and … wait for it …

Those who experience more gratitude have a lesser risk of dying – they live longer.

It’s not just touchy feely any longer.

So, the nurses were asked to fill out a questionnaire about their attitudes concerning gratitude.

Three years later, women who had the highest levels of gratitude experienced a 9% lower risk of death of any cause, including cardiovascular disease, cancer and neurodegenerative disease.

Don’t need insurance, a wonder drug or doctor’s appointments.

Just saying “thank you” is a simple way to get started.

Finally, something positive – feel free to forward this to a friend.

The Price of Delay

It was my friend’s birthday on October 3. 

When I was reminded on social media, I said to myself that I would contact him later and perhaps write a note.

But before the day ended and on his birthday George Johns, a friend I’ve known in radio died.

So instead of the usual, yearly happy birthday wish, it was a sad face emoji and a missed opportunity for one last good wish delivered.

Fortunately, we have had no shortage of warm contact back and forth over the years but it made me remember how important it is to not put off the important stuff.

And do not postpone joy which is all that matters in a life of gratitude.

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Relationship Skills

Ironically, the skills that often help people succeed in their careers, do the exact opposite in their personal relationships.

Being goal-oriented, always in control, relentlessly uncompromising can be an impediment.

Perhaps that’s why some of the most powerful and successful business executives are not as successful in their marriages and relationships.

Relationship skills that matter are the ability to compromise, letting others get their way and the credit, encouraging them to lead and you follow as well as the ability to give away the power you have to enable others to feel strong.

Businesses succeed on the strength to persevere and win.

Personal relationships often do better when power is shared, even given away for a consensus compromise.

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Your 3 Biggest Problems

I asked my NYU students in our ‘mental health for musicians’ class to write down on a 3×5 card what they think are their 3 biggest problems.

First, I need to give them pencils because they often don’t have them.

Fascinating that it sometimes takes a long time for them to write the 3 problems down because they worry about so many things – just like the rest of us.

By focusing on the biggest causes of anxiety, they see (sometimes for the first time) the real roadblocks to happiness.

Worth a try today?

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Defeat Procrastination

20% of adults admit to being chronic procrastinators – back in the 1970’s it was only 5%.

They admit to spending an average of 2 hours and 25 minutes per day procrastinating and over 55 days per year.

If you want to try something to ignite your abilities faster, here’s a plan:

  • The 2-minute rule: If you can do an action in two minutes or less, tackle it at the moment without delay, without burdening your to-do list – just wipe it out.

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End Self-Sabotage

If someone else insists on being critical of you today, let them do it all alone.

Buying into or believing negative thoughts that come from others is self-sabotage – we don’t give people like that this kind of help.

When people do (or don’t do) things that block their success or prevent them from accomplishing their goals, it’s self-sabotage.

Today’s goal — become aware and don’t become part of it.

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Out of a Funk

I love this from Oprah Winfrey:

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough”.

And being driven by what you think you want may come up short because when you get it, it won’t be long before you want something else.

The trick is really appreciate what you have now, this moment.

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Diplomacy

Remember that diplomacy is the art of letting the other party have things your way.

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Head and Heart

The head and heart often get mistakenly assigned to the wrong task.

  • Think with your head
  • Feel with your heart
  • Not the reverse

“The heart is forever making the head its fool” — François de la Rochefoucauld.

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Real Friendship

Adversity can actually strengthen friendships as George Washington pointed out:

  • “True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation”.
  • We earn the right to be a friend – friendship is not just a feeling – a good or great feeling – it is much more. 
  • I love this definition of a true friend: “Your friend is the man (person) who knows all about you, and still likes you.” (Elbert Hubbard)

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