Here’s a follow-up to my piece last week titled “Dealing With Rejection”.

Tools to nip rejection in the bud.

• Compassion is the best weapon against shamers.  Think, “I feel sorry for anyone who has to resort to (insert here)”. Understanding how terrible it must be to resort to shaming gives you the power to resist it.
• Shamers are often guilty of that which they project onto others. This puts the insults in their proper place – out of your mind.
• Shame or rejection is more effectively dealt with as soon as they are recognized. Often, rejection is internalized as a defense but this delay actually makes everything feel worse.
• No one gets to shame us – not even ourselves. Shame is a tool used to control others. When you feel shame, remember that someone is trying more to control you than to persuade you.

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