Fear is the belief that something or someone is likely to cause pain.

Fortunately, these beliefs rarely (1% of the time) actually happen so what kills us is not what we fear but the process of being fearful.

My father had a heart attack at 37.  I saw my mother worry until the day he died and the day she died.  It became a bad pattern that is typical of what happens when the fear thought gets out of hand.

So this is a topic close to my heart and I’d like to share a few coping mechanisms in the hope that they may be helpful to you:

• Ask what is the worst possible outcome that could happen. Make it really bad.  Can you live with that?  Will you be forced to live with that?  The worst is not likely to occur so take consolation in that.
• Focus on the one thing you will do if what you fear should become a reality. Think it through in detail.  Just knowing your game plan reduces the fear factor.  Chances are great statistically that you will never need to act on this plan.
• Let go of the fear (hey, I know this one isn’t easy but it works).  The more we don’t try to control the outcome, the better the outcome and the happier we are.
• Attach a gratitude that matches the thing that you fear.  If you fear losing your job, focus on what a great career you are having in spite of it.  Fear losing a loved one?  Be thankful for having had that person in your life.  Fear financial ruin?  You’ve earned a living in the past and you will do it again and even better in the future.

The anticipation of fear is far worse than what we actually fear.  There are always effective things we can do to relieve the stress of worry.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to social media.