This is what Nadine Collier, the daughter of one of the nine victims of Dylann Roof’s shooting spree in a Charleston, SC Church said just a few days after the murders:

“I forgive you … I will never talk to her ever again, never be able to hold her again. I forgive you and have mercy on your soul. You hurt me, you hurt a lot of people, but I forgive you.”

Another relative of one of the shooting victims said, “hate won’t win”.

What remarkable people these are and what a gift they give all of us even as they are grieving that in the many ways we could forgive others for lesser and sometimes petty offenses, they show by example that hate breeds hate.

It’s not easy to be like this, but it is the goal and after this latest example of continued racial violence, it gives us hope.

For me, if many of these relatives could forgive such a heinous crime, what would be my excuse for not forgiving the people who have hurt me in lesser ways?

As always, a reminder that we can never change another person – only ourselves.

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