When a student tells their parents “I got 4 A’s and a B”, often the first response is “what did you get the B in?”  Not tell me about your report card.

For every “I got the promotion”, often the first comment is “how much more does it pay?” not “that’s great news – tell me about it.”

“I’m a finalist” often evokes “who else are you competing against and/or what are your chances?” instead of a simple and enthusiastic “congratulations – well done”.

The default setting is increasingly negative.

Lifting up and not running down is positive enforcement.

You want to be the person doing all the “lifting”.

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