Phones are supposed to be tools that help us with our lives, but they are increasingly becoming our lives.

When you are spending an hour a day on social media such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or SnapChat, your phone isn’t working for you.

When you can’t put it down without checking it, you are the tool and the phone is your master.

When you clean up email, scan websites and visit social media rather than start a conversation with another person, your life has been hijacked.

When your phone over a family member, friend or associate is so important that it can rivet your attention, you are being robbed of happiness.  Studies prove it if you don’t already know it.

1. Never keep talking when another person turns their attention to their phone instead of what you are saying.  Stop and wait.  If they insist they’re still listening, continue to wait until they can give you the attention you deserve.  Same applies to you.

2. Before cellphones, dinner was uninterrupted by calls and distractions.  Put that same rule back into effect today.  No texting, peeking, chatting or talking on cellphones while eating with the family.

3. Same is true of business lunches.  I sat with a media exec who put not one but two phones on the table while I tried to ask him to support my student labs at USC.  It was so maddening I almost didn’t care anymore.  I just wanted to leave.  He knew I was irked and said “What can I do for you?” and I said “$15,000 for my students”.  He said, “of course”.  And I got the money but never had lunch with him again.

4. Phones are breeding places for anxiety.  When you feel stressed, don’t just put the phone away, turn it off.

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