Stage one – devastation.

Loss of confidence.  Often surprise.  Inability to comprehend why things went wrong.  Dejection.

Stage two – blaming yourself.

What did I do wrong (not what did others do or how did circumstances affect my fate).  Fear of trying again.  Deeper loss of self-esteem and an inability to come up with a plan to persevere.

But that doesn’t have to be the end of it.

Start reminding yourself successful people usually overcome adversity. 

Learn from the situation and be specific.

Never blame yourself – denigrating you is not a winning formula to move ahead.

Be extra kind to yourself – setbacks hurt, we’re human, but being nice rather than overly critical can heal a lot of hurt.

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