If someone puts you down, they are a fool.

If you put yourself down by underestimating your potential and accomplishments, you are the bigger fool.

Allowing others to tear you down is self-destruction.

No one succeeds who doubts themselves.

Keep trying to change someone and you will always be miserable.

Change their politics.

Their priorities.

Their goals.

Their beliefs.

It cannot be done.

Concentrate on the one person you can change – you.

1. Think of your latest victory.
2. And how you do your best to handle adversity.
3. Recall a success in dealing with difficult people.
4. Forgive yourself for not being perfect.
5. For what and for whom are you grateful to have in your life at this moment.

The opposite of FOMO is going on an adventure and experiencing the unexpected.

FOMO has been proven to add anxiety to everyday living.

Lower expectations and set off on an adventure, give up control and let whatever happens happen.

Replace fear of missing out with willingness to go all in.

One key doesn’t open every lock and there is no one way to get people to cooperate – it takes a different key to unlock people.

Sometimes it’s not even a key, but a FOB.  Assuming that one way to win cooperation from any someone will work on everyone will lead to disappointment.  Every person requires different things.  So the idea is not to use a master key to get the best out of people but to carry around a bunch of keys that will inspire others to follow you.

I ain’t lookin’ to compete with you
Beat on, cheat on, mistreat you
Simplify you, classify you
Deny, defy, mystify you

Frighten you or uptighten you
Drag you down or drain you down
Chain you down or bring you down

Now I ain’t lookin’ to block you up
Dock or rock or lock you up
Analyze you, categorize you
Finalize or advertise you

I don’t want to straight-face you
Race or chase or track or trace you
Or disgrace you or displace you
Or define you or confine you

Now I don’t want to meet your kin
Make you spin or do you in
Or select you or dissect you
Or inspect you or reject you

All I really want to do … is be friends with you.

All I Really Want to Do lyrics © BMG Rights Management

Darwin talked about survival of the fittest but now a new book is focusing on survival of the friendliest.

Cooperation and sociability are turning out to be just as important as physical strength and endurance especially in the high-tech age.

Dogs and wolves are cited as examples.  Wolves being strong and fierce and dogs being their friendly descendants.  Wolves are endangered.  Dogs are people’s best friend and exist in great numbers.

Friendliness may be worth doubling down on from the board room to personal relationships.  Learning how to win cooperation and teamwork are the skills that can make us thrive.

Alex Trebek has had two heart attacks, survived brain surgery for blood clots, lived through an automobile accident and now is fighting a deadly and painful cancer, pancreatic.

Last year, he was sighted in his office so sick from chemotherapy that he was on the floor sobbing in pain.  And yet he refused to cancel the marathon tapings of “Jeopardy!”.

Announcer Johnny Gilbert is quoted as saying “Once I introduce him on that stage, he is Alex Trebek.  You can tell that that’s what he’s living for.”

What are we living for?  What makes us work through pain, disappointment and anxiety to overcome adversity.  Alex Trebek is putting on a real time clinic.

• Mistakes are not to be feared because they help us adjust, learn and grow.
• When mistakes are made that inadvertently hurt others, a sincere apology can smooth them over.
• Think of it – we hate making mistakes even though a person has yet to be born who doesn’t make lots of them.
• Turn that around to look like welcoming mistakes the way we accept directions from Waze and Google Maps – information needed to get us to our destination not meant to discourage.

Those who have beaten cancer don’t waste time bemoaning their misfortune.

They speak of victory not victimhood.  About what they have accomplished not the disease.  Next time our jobs are stressing us, or we have to deal with relationship problems or any other adversity we face, let the cancer survivor remind us to focus on our victories not just our difficulties.