The phrase “touch grass” is internet slang used to tell someone they’ve been online too long, are too deep in digital arguments or drama, and need to step away from the screen to reconnect with real life.

It’s a gentle insult wrapped in good advice — suggesting that someone has drifted too far into virtual worlds or echo chambers and could use a little real-world grounding. A bit of sunlight, a walk outside, or just literally touching grass might help them reset.

I teach college students who have no problem turning off their phones — most don’t like that they spend about 93 minutes a day on TikTok.

But there’s another way to escape the pull of screens in a world where you can’t live or work without them: stay busy. Fill your time with things that matter offline, and you’ll touch grass without even thinking about it.

“Simply put, humans are not wired to be constantly wired.” — Cal Newport 

Feel free to share

During the recent Amazon Web Services outage, more than 1,000 web-based products were affected not the least of which was internet dependent beds – the kinds that cost thousands of dollars and allow temperature control and positional variations.  From an X post via ars technica) “Would be great if my bed wasn’t stuck in an inclined position due to an AWS outage. C’mon now.”

From Reddit: “I woke up too hot in the middle of the night last night and kept double-tapping like a maniac to adjust the temperature down since I wasn’t getting any haptic feedback. I only found out why after I got up in the morning.”

We are hopelessly tethered to the Internet – imagine not being able to adjust a smart bed into a smart comfortable position.

Consumers can start by asking one question before buying anything “smart”: What happens if the internet goes down?

Present Shock author Douglas Rushkoff was right:   “We are being programmed by the very devices we program.”

DayStarters are for sharing

You know the debate – I can take criticism, but only constructive criticism.  But what about criticism from a bot, from artificial intelligence, how would you like that?

According to a Dayforce study (they’re an HR software company), 87% say they use artificial intelligence at work, 57% of managers and 27% of employees yet 71% of workers have had no AI training.

But the missing link is that it doesn’t actually study how AI-driven criticism or feedback affects people.  The survey is about adoption and training, not how bots giving feedback might impact morale, motivation, or performance, which would need other behavioral or psychological research to fill in.

Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak back in 1983 said “Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window.”

Feel free to share

Sometimes it feels like with each new day, we’re facing the same old problems.  But actually, many times we chip away with solutions or workarounds and still feel like we’re getting nowhere.

One reason is that people actually are pretty good at eventually dealing with their life’s challenges – what they (I should say, we) do not do really well with is moving on.  I have friends struggling with separation and marital issues who are making real progress but going back and sawing sawdust, as Dale Carnegie would call it, creating a major problem.

We can’t heal while replaying the same story in our heads. As Fr. Martin Padovani says, “Emotions themselves aren’t the problem — it’s what we do with them that keeps us stuck.” Moving on means forgiving ourselves and others, accepting that what’s done is done, and redirecting that energy toward something new. It’s not denial; it’s release. The future won’t look different until we stop staring at the rearview mirror.

Ian Morgan Cron says “When the past calls, let it go to voicemail. It has nothing new to say.”

Feel free to share

Have you heard about Delete Day that was held in Manhattan where 100 people got together to trash their social media apps and get back in touch with life?  Other events are planned for cities here and abroad. The idea is get off of social media, it’s toxic.  And with artificial intelligence (AI), things get more worrisome.

Starting around December 2025, ChatGPT will allow “erotica for verified adult users” under a new age-verification system — part of its “treat adult users like adults” principle. When I initially asked ChatGPT about this because all my students use their app, they denied it.  When I pressed them, they admitted it. They’re already pulling a fast one.

Young people are getting ahead of this.  I have seen more deleting of apps (even if temporarily) than before – they are aware that life is not better because they are addicted to an algorithm.  Still, I saw a ten-year old boy with his father in the Apple Store this weekend being fitted for his first iPhone.

In today’s world, trusting algorithms for health and happiness is not the only option.

“It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.”   That was said in 1946!  Almost eighty years ago! By Albert Einstein.  So, our current distraction is not our first.

Feel free to share

I went to the local New Balance store to buy a new pair of shoes; unhappy with my Asics – I wound up with four teenish looking salespeople to come to my aid.  So, I asked one: “What shoes do you wear when you are not required to wear New Balance in the store?”  Without hesitation, one said, “Adidas” and that sealed the deal.  No, I didn’t buy the Adidas. I bought New Balance because I knew I would get honest answers to my questions.

Honesty isn’t always appreciated.  When I was a teen working in the West Philly Sears sporting goods department, I talked a grandmother out of buying a very expense tent supposedly for her grandson for them to use on a family camping trip – such a nice lady.

Turns out she was not a grandmother but a Sears shopper checking to see that sales associates were upselling at all costs — so, I was banished to the snack bar for a few months as punishment.

There’s something about honesty that never goes out of style even in the present age of the internet, social media and dare I say influencers.

Honesty earns something far more valuable than approval – trust.  Gloria Steinem used to echo President James Garfield when she reminded us, “The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.” 

Snackable and sharable.

The LA Dodgers advanced in their playoff series with the Phillies after relief pitcher Orion Kerkering failed to cleanly field a ball hit at him on the mound as a Dodger runner was heading home to win the game.  All he had to do was throw the ball to first base and the inning would have safely ended.  He panicked and threw a wild throw to home plate and is now struggling to live with a huge mistake that eliminated his team from postseason playoffs.

His teammates are rallying behind him but it begs the question that many often feel when they have let others down not for lack of trying.  Mistakes made under pressure have a way of freezing in time, replaying endlessly in our minds. Kerkering’s error wasn’t from lack of effort but from being human — the moment when instinct and fear collide.

Eventually, he may arrive at the comforting thought that what defines him now isn’t the wild throw, but how he learns to stand on the mound again, proof that redemption often begins where perfection ends.

As Viktor Frankl said “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

Share with someone

The house across from mine is getting a new roof and as I was assessing its progress, I saw a roofer standing on the crest with his phone in hand. Yes, this experienced worker even walked never taking his eyes off his phone.

As if that high wire act wasn’t enough, a second worker removed his jacket and sat on the top of the house waiting for more shingles to be hoisted – glued to his phone.

NYU Professor Jonathan Haidt treats problematic phone use as a kind of addiction that must be managed by building strong off-screen habits — for example, creating large chunks of time during the day (or week) when devices are off, enforcing “phone-free” zones (like schools or bedrooms), and delaying or limiting social media/phone access in youth to help break the cycle.

Or as they sarcastically say on social media “You need to touch some grass.”

“If your world fits in your hand, you’ve already made it too small.”

Feel free to share.

One of my favorite college professors was Harry Weinberg – his course was general semantics and his book was called Levels of Knowing and Existence.  I know, it seems boring but it was fascinating. I took it with my best friend Bob Donze (he got an A, I got a B but don’t remind him).

In one class, Weinberg who had suffered a stroke previously and talked with a speech impediment as a result asked the class “what color is a red light?”  We laughed and made fun of him (hope my NYU students are not reading this part).  This foolishness went on for an hour until the bell rang and he said one last time “what color is a red light?” Wait until you hear his answer.

RED.  Unless you are color blind.  His point:  by adding “to me” the light is red makes it a fact because it can be observed and verified.  To someone else, red may be a different color.

It wasn’t really about traffic lights — it was about perspective. Weinberg was teaching us that truth is not always absolute but filtered through experience. That lesson feels even more urgent now, when algorithms, echo chambers, and social feeds convince us our “red” is the only red.

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” — Marcus Aurelius

DayStarters are for sharing

Some days are just impossible to get through – things go wrong, life happens, and somehow we persist. My broadcasting friends who read this know the many human problems that they have had to overcome to rise above sadness and make the show go on. Here’s one that motivates me from Fred Rogers (Mister Rogers):

“My greatest challenge?  I suppose to walk through the door and sing ‘It’s A Beautiful Day in this Neighborhood’ when I have had a real sadness in my life. I had to go to Miami one hour after my father’s funeral because they were having a Mister Rogers Day there that could not be cancelled. We had 23 fifteen-minute performances in one day. I had to sing ‘It’s A Beautiful Day in this Neighborhood’ for each one of them.”

Even in the hardest moments, he chose presence over pain — a reminder that showing up with kindness can be its own kind of healing.

Share with someone

I asked one of my classes what they would do if they were stranded on a deserted island with no food but they could have either Spotify or TikTok, not both.  You see, I wanted to find out which music app they really like best.  After all, it’s a music business class.

One asked where can they charge their phones on this island – see how practical they are? I said you get to crank a box for 20 minutes to get 20 minutes of battery time.  One student said, she would probably choose Spotify because it would allow her to get over her TikTok addiction (moms and dads, it’s 93 minutes a day among American users).

More importantly, I am getting a sense with this new crop of students starting school in the Fall that they are very aware of the dangers of being too connected and want to do something about it.

By the way, 12 chose Spotify, 10 chose TikTok and almost everyone wanted to find a way to reign in social media app use – a positive thing.

It’s a spirit of wanting to use connection thoughtfully rather than letting it control them. Billy Cox, best known for performing with Jimi Hendrix says “Technology should improve your life… not become your life.” 

Feel free to share

What to do when the world seems unable to focus and we are beginning to believe we’re talking to ourselves.  Last week as my wife and I were driving down a country road, a truck was coming at us as it drifted way over the center line, the driver looking down not at the road – hitting the horn helped the distracted driver look up just in time.  He made a gesture toward me.

No, not that gesture but a waving of the hand, a thank you for helping to avoid what surely would have been a messy accident.

We know not to text and drive. But somehow, it is becoming more difficult to focus. Driving of only a dramatic way we’re increasingly distracted.  One way is to stop looking past now to tomorrow, beyond this moment to the future. Keep focus on the now and today.

When you look to the future you’re dreaming and hoping.  That’s why author Eckhart Tolle advises “Realize deeply that the present moment is all you have. Make the now the primary focus of your life.”

Feel free to share

It turns out we are not likely to have any shortage of friends in our lives, we’re just missing the right one.  Especially among younger adults there seems to be an outbreak of self-sabotage – attacking ourselves when no one else will do it.

The most important relationship is the one with yourself.  Get that wrong, let it slide, demean it and there’s likely trouble with relationships with others. I don’t know whether it’s the COVID lockdown or the challenging world in which we live but we’re not paying attention to the most important relationship.

Negative self-talk is often harsher than what others say. Self-compassion is not indulgence; it’s maintenance for every other relationship.

As the saying goes “I’m too busy working on my own grass to notice if yours is greener.”

Feel free to share

I saw an article recently that got me at “Your brain sort of wakes up like wet cement,”

a phrase behavioral scientist Zelana Montminy author of Finding Focus used to illustrate why checking our phones when we wake up is baking in an unhappy day.

Yes, exactly – and I still do it.  But doing it less is apparently also good taking off a few minutes a day until it makes a difference.

This semester, my NYU college students don’t even have to be reminded to turn their mobile devices off and stow them out of sight, they want to.  And you see the benefits in class engagement and happier interactions.

It’s not reasonable in a digital world to take away someone’s phone all day, but spending more time focused on now is beneficial. And as school districts begin to silence phones during the academic day, there is an increase in checking out library books.

“That phone in your pocket is like a slot machine. Every time you check it, you’re pulling the lever to see if you get a reward.” — Tristan Harris on 60 Minutes.

Feel free to share

In the third class of the fall semester one of my classes surprised me by turning off their digital devices before being prompted – I think in part, because they know they need a break.

A low-key day to recharge, break from noise, stress or constant contact with friends and through social media.  I felt the same way – it’s so good to be focused on one important thing or nothing.

The average TikTok user spends 96 minutes a day on the app and watching TV was the leisure and sports activity that occupied the most time (2.6 hours per day) accounting for over half of all leisure time, on average (5.1 hours per day) according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

Giving full attention to one thing or nothing can be deeply satisfying:  “Wherever you are, be there totally.” — Eckhart Tolle.

Share, if you like

If you really want people to be honest with you, they have to feel safe as if they can expect your approval and acceptance for telling you the truth.  That means no judging.

When people expect criticism, dismissal, or disapproval, they will either retreat into silence or tell you only what they think you want to hear. But when they know they’ll be met with openness, empathy, and respect — even if their truth is uncomfortable — they are far more likely to trust you enough to share it. In that way, non-judgment isn’t weakness; it’s the foundation of genuine connection.

Billy Joel’s Honesty is about the rarity and value of truth in relationships. One of its famous lines is “Honesty is such a lonely word” implying that when there is honesty, there must be a foundation (lack of judgment, acceptance) to support it.

Feel free to share

Finding out this semester that the doom and gloom news about the world, their futures and potential job availability is weighing heavier on young people – in fact, all of us.

I like to think of times like this to embark on a Gratitude Tour – keying on something positive that we are grateful for and acknowledging it.  I’m seeing pessimism for the first time among young people who should otherwise be looking forward to their future.

People need to hear that every generation has faced turbulence, but within turbulence lies opportunity. They are not powerless — they’re entering an age of reinvention.  In a world drowning in bad news, a daily dose of gratitude can reset perspective and build resilience.

Fred Rogers had a way of finding light in dark news:  “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”

Feel free to share

You learn something every day when you are in front of college students – a simple assignment to connect with industry people on LinkedIn gets resistance. Why?  Job shaming.

Some folks don’t have jobs that they are proud of – that might be considered too menial. And others have no current job at all when their friends may.  This is a further degradation of self-esteem through social media where for many years now we have been dancing to the tunes of so-called influencers and reacting rather than responding to messages we receive.

LinkedIn is for connecting in the workplace – not for polishing a resume that makes you look better than others.  It’s time to take some pride in accomplishments.  Perhaps, like me, you have had some jobs on your career path that don’t look or sound impressive that have made all the difference in the end.

“When a half‐assed job doesn’t bother you, it speaks volumes about the kind of person you are. Until you start feeling a sense of pride and self-respect in the work you do, no matter how small or overlooked those jobs might be, you will continue to half-ass your life.”  — a summarized sentiment from former Navy Seal David Goggins

Feel free to share

Viktor Frankl said “Live as if you were living for the second time.”

Every crisis presents opportunity.

Learn from the mistakes of your “first life”.

Those who have come face to face with their own mortality take Frankl’s advice literally because it is never too late to hit “restart” and change the course of your life.

No matter the crisis, you can change the direction and alter your life.

Or as George Eliot (the pen name of 19^th century novelist Mary Ann Evans) says “It is never too late to be what you might have been.” 

DayStarters are for sharing

This semester I asked my new NYU students how they are feeling about things and what I heard took me by surprise.

They are tired – tired of beating their heads against the wall and if this is surprising to you, Gen Z suffers higher anxiety than any other generation.  Living on their phones, in social media with high expectations in a world that seems harsh to them is starting to have an effect.

Jobs are getting scarce and they are feeling a bit beat up.

My response will be to overcome and take advantage of the good aspects of disruption that is affecting their lives.  Disruption leads to new opportunities.  Coping with stress at a youthful age helps later.  Learning to get up when you fail and be grateful for what you have is the other side of feeling psychologically burdened.

So, I remind them of Dale Carnegie who says “Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.”

Feel free to share