If you assume that people think rationally, then you are likely to end up in an argument.

For difficult conversations, there are alternatives:

• The use of facts usually blows up in our face because humans don’t think rationally.
• When people feel threatened (and the facts can do that), they go into protection mode where ears close and mouths open (it’s actually a scientific fact that our brains essentially overheat).
• It’s more effective to skip trying to win the argument. Make it all about sharing information and asking (and listening) what the other person feels.
• Ask questions, don’t make statements. Communication of all types is fostered by those who learn to be skillful at asking questions and allowing others to see your point of view in their words not yours.

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