If you really want people to be honest with you, they have to feel safe as if they can expect your approval and acceptance for telling you the truth.  That means no judging.

When people expect criticism, dismissal, or disapproval, they will either retreat into silence or tell you only what they think you want to hear. But when they know they’ll be met with openness, empathy, and respect — even if their truth is uncomfortable — they are far more likely to trust you enough to share it. In that way, non-judgment isn’t weakness; it’s the foundation of genuine connection.

Billy Joel’s Honesty is about the rarity and value of truth in relationships. One of its famous lines is “Honesty is such a lonely word” implying that when there is honesty, there must be a foundation (lack of judgment, acceptance) to support it.

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