Alone No More

  • You’re never alone when you stand up for yourself.

The Blame Game

  • Young people especially seem to feel that when something is wrong, it is their fault.
  • Amazing how when things are bad, we are programmed to blame ourselves but when things go well, we shake it off.
  • Blame is useless – it doesn’t work when directed at others no matter how merited one thinks it is and it is among the most dangerous things we can do to ourselves.
  • When things go wrong, fix them and when they go right repeat them over and over on a recurring loop in your brain.
  • Blaming does not motivate anyone to be better.

Hugs

  • When the Kansas City Chiefs won their playoff game against the Buffalo Bills in an exciting last-minute climax, Chief’s quarterback Patrick Mahomes stopped celebrating with his team to cross the field and hug and console his opponent Josh Allen who was spectacular in the game.
  • Hugs are not always physical – they can be pep talks or expressions of pride, confidence or support you have in another person.
  • A hug can simply be lending an ear to one in need of a listener.
  • But a hug starts by sharing your good fortune or a gift that you have with another without expectations of getting something in return.
  • “Hugs” whether physical or verbal always involve two people with their arms and ears wide open.

Contagious Courage

  • According to research, people feel worse in a crowd – if a friend is shaking in fear, the calmest person may start shaking.
  • Courage is also contagious – watch someone do something brave and others will jump in.
  • That happened recently when a woman got her leg caught under her car when failing to put it in park as she exited.
  • A group of courageous people lifted the car allowing the woman to be pulled out – she survived with injuries, but survived.
  • How we think matters – if we live in fear, we will assuredly spread it to others (and vice versa) but if we emphasize our courage, not fear, we spread it to others and they to us.

Aiming for Great

  • My friend, the talented morning show personality Jerry Puffer told me he once worked for a program director who wanted one GREAT show from him a week, a few more good ones and some wiggle room for an off day.
  • When we aim high, we accomplish more.
  • To have that great day, it requires the belief that no person can be perfect every day but they can sure try.
  • When presented like this, most people will up their game and say “yeah, I CAN do that”.

Adapting to Change

  • Politicians get elected by selling the voters change but most people fear change – what they want is better.
  • New rules, new bosses, new routines and new people in your life can add to the anxiety of not knowing what the future brings.
  • “When you’re finished changing, you’re finished” said Ben Franklin.
  • Think back to changes in your life – not all of them were bad, in fact most were good or needed to happen.
  • The strong aren’t best suited to survive, it’s the ones who can best manage change who are.

Regret and Fear

  • For all the problems we have this day, it is not today that is making us anxious.
  • It’s what happened yesterday and the day before.
  • And the fear of tomorrow.
  • Now is the safest place to be.

Exceeding Your Potential

“Everyone has inside of him a piece of good news. The good news is that you don’t know how great you can be! How much you can love! What you can accomplish! And what your potential is!” – Anne Frank

  • It doesn’t take a major retooling of the fine person we are to become better.
  • It’s about remembering (and not forgetting) the power we have to exceed even our own expectations.
  • Never forget your own power.

Burnout and Loneliness

  • Rarely alone, often online and increasingly lonely according to a recent Wall Street Journal article about middle age moms that is applicable to all.
  • Social media has both helped and hurt with dealing with burnout and loneliness during covid.
  • Become an organizer and help others return to a normal life – walking, meeting, socializing in person.
  • Using social media increases loneliness – here’s an Italian study.
  • Staying busy, remaining positive and owning a problem that is in search of a solution is a strong way to relieve the pain of burnout and loneliness.

Rejection Correction

  • What really hurts is not so much being turned down or turned away as much as being made to feel your contributions are not legitimate.
  • I operate off of the batting average theory I mentioned here before: If I succeed one out of four times, I am hitting .250 (25%) and that’s not bad because no one bats 1.000 — ever.
  • When faced with rejection, do not accept anything that makes your efforts feel not legitimate.
  • No one rightfully can expect to live life or work at their career totally without rejection but it is our responsibility not to let anyone make our efforts feel illegitimate.