“You don’t have to like your coach, but you must respect your coach. If you’re on good terms all the time, then he’s probably not pushing your hard enough.”
That’s what Hall of Fame hockey player Mark Messier said about the NHL coach Mike Keenan, also known as “Iron Mike”.
Whether we’re parents, or employers, whether its sports or work you get the best out of your team when you push them to grow.
It’s like no pain, no gain in exercise.
Feel free to share.
I have a student who gladly spends 7 hours a day on TikTok – yes, and she can prove it.
A year ago, I had another student who spent 6 hours a day on TikTok, tried to give it up – it lasted a week and then back on it.
The average on social media for TikTok is 93 minutes a day. And it’s not just TikTok, it’s Instagram and other apps.
This is insane but adults have their own issues looking into their devices instead of into the eyes of others or off in the distance to the world around them.
It is possible to enjoy social media or other apps without turning into that app – what it takes is a plan to take charge of your life.
Code writers build apps to keep you glued so they can serve endless content and ads.
Feel free to share.
Welcoming challenges rather than seeing them as threats is “positive discomfort”.
A recent Washington Post story tells how U.S. women’s national soccer team coach Emma Hayes kept her starters in the lineup for a “grueling” 90 minutes – it looked like the team would be eliminated by sheer exhaustion.
But instead, they won the gold medal.
This is no pain, no gain on steroids.
“Fun, goofiness, humanity and cohesion” and “love”.
But one important caveat.
Before you ask others to weather discomfort, the team whether on the field or at the office must feel that you are on their side.
If you like this, please share.
We spend most of our lives working and sleeping – not necessarily in a balanced way.
Glassdoor research indicates that 65% of professionals they surveyed are feeling “stuck” in their careers.
Tech people 73%. Women 68%. Men 62%.
Fewer people are quitting their jobs and layoffs are spreading with and without the help of artificial intelligence.
There’s work. There’s need to make a living. And there are career moves.
You don’t need a survey to know when you’re feeling you’re stuck in a job – do the one thing most people do not do – trust instincts and act.
Tomorrow is not a better time – now is the best time.
Feel free to pass this along.
It turns out that music may be better than drugs to pep up our moods.
Clinical research shows every area of the brain responds positively to music.
In one of my NYU classes, students are asked to share “mood music” at the start of each class and tell how that selection found them.
We are more than a streaming service or a radio.
People respond positively to music.
Southwest Airlines is experimenting with adding music that plays 120 beats per minute to push passengers to board their flight faster.
The uses are endless.
Feel free to pass this along.
The more we practice gratitude, the more we have to be grateful for.
“Gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart and not in the mind” – Lionel Hampton
Happy Thanksgiving!
Here is a short course in human relations:
The 6 Most Important Words …
I admit I made a mistake
The 5 Most Important Words …
You did a good job.
The 4 Most Important Words …
What is your opinion?
The 3 Most Important Words …
If you please
The 2 Most Important Words …
Thank you!
The Most Important Word …
We
The Least Important Word …
I
If you liked this pass it on to others.
The radio legend Paul Harvey shared a story about a man who expressed love in a most memorable way – a way we might want to emulate and a way I shall never forget.
Imagine opening the glove compartment of your car in a stressful situation like an auto accident to read the premeditated reassurance from a loved one that the most important cargo is you and not the mangled metal.
Steven King says:
“The most important things are the hardest to say, because words diminish them”.
I hope this is shareworthy.
There was a wonderful guy who was a disc jockey and later program director of WFIL in Philadelphia.
It was memorable to watch Jay Cook work.
As soon as his microphone went on, he put a smile on his face. Then he talked.
There’s no doubt that smiles change the way others see and respond to us. But they also change us.
You can’t be mad with a smile on your face. Or down. Or unhappy
Smiling is a real tool to bring about positive change initiated by you and not dependent on others going first.
As Tom Wilson said, “A smile is a facelift that’s in everyone’s price range!”
Kobe Bryant spoke publicly and lovingly about his Lower Merion, PA high school teacher who taught him a key driver of motivation:
If you liked this pass it on to others.
It seems we’re caught up on what other people think of us especially when we post things on social media and wait to see how many thumbs up, likes or comments others do.
Our lives are not up for a vote – we should not be asking others to “like” what we do or say.
The more we try to treat our lives like an ongoing election, the more unhappiness it brings.
It doesn’t really matter whether others like us – do we like us?
Holding a virtual election on who we are as a person always ends in defeat.
Live life as if no one gets to vote on how you live it.
Finally, election news you can use – go ahead and share.
Boston Celtics Head Coach Joe Mazzulla before kicking off the current NBA basketball season said he feels “zero pressure” to repeat last year’s World Championship.
Never mind that the Celtics have won a total of 18 banners in their storied history.
“We’re all going to be dead soon, and it really doesn’t matter anymore. So, there’s zero pressure.”
“”There’s nothing anyone in this circle can do to me that’s going to impact my identity and who I am as a person or a coach. We’re either going to win or we’re not, and 40 years from now, none of you are invited to my funeral and that’s it.”
It’s blunt but it’s true.
Like life all the good things we do carry over from year to year.
If there’s one thing never to forget it’s what got you to success.
Added pressure does not help.
So many life lessons in sports – feel free to share.
The makers of Ruffles and Tostitos is planning to add 20% more chips into their bonus bags.
Ruffles and Tostitos were losing market share at Walmart while their own brand Great Value has been growing in chips and pretzels.
Many consumers feel the pinch but companies usually don’t until sales decline begging the question what’s a fair deal.
In human interaction when we promise more and do less, it usually doesn’t end well.
Maybe it doesn’t apply to food brands but when you make a promise and deliver more ahead of schedule, you are always going to come out ahead.
That last line could be life altering, feel free to share
4 in 10 people have not made a new friend in over a year.
We’re constantly told how social isolation is a bad thing and yet this long after the pandemic, it’s seems even harder to find new friendships.
The research was conducted for CheapCaribbean Vacations so you can understand their interest in surveying the marketplace.
But the time with a friend has no clock on it – in fact, more important than the number of friends we have is the time spent present — focused on what each other is saying.
I saw research recently that said to avoid social isolation even one friend fits the bill.
This fascinates me, if you find it helpful feel free to share.
If you’ve been born into a happy family accept it and enjoy.
If not, family does not have to be based on genetics.
I considered someone not related to me a close brother and some who were distant – other people feel the same way.
Thanksgiving is coming, a time when families get together and either have a ball or melt down – the beauty of relationships is that the people we trust, feel close to, enjoy and can get along with are family.
Celebrate the joy of healthy relationships and feast on their many benefits not the obstacles that often last a lifetime and make us feel unhappy.
I live these DayStarters which is how I can write them – please, share.
Sam’s Club believes the store they are opening in Grapevine, TX is the store of the future – soon to expand in 30 locations.
A robot sweeps the aisles, takes inventory, and checkout lanes are replaced with apps that allow customers to purchase goods without human contact although some human’s will standby.
Then there’s Costco – a company that values their employees who love to work for the company and will continue to serve samples of food in person to make your Saturday.
The long lines will remain, humans will ring you up, you will bring your own bags and boxes and any robotics or AI used will likely be behind the scenes.
You can replace some tasks, but not people as the future will show us.
Never be afraid of AI (artificial intelligence). AI is just our best thinking scraped by algorithms – not our next thinking.
Share with a non-robotic tap below.
I asked one of my college classes to write a paper on the most difficult person in their lives as of two weeks ago.
Out of 25 students, 3 said they were the most difficult person in their own lives. The rest cited family, friends and associates at work or internships.
We are not the problem.
We have problems – everyone does.
But we are the solution to whatever challenges come into our lives.
Just reminding ourselves from time to time of the power we have to make a difference is the difference.
Share with someone you think might appreciate this thought.
Very often we solve perceived problems before we can state what they actually are.
Think of that beautiful earthrise that was taken from the astronauts’ moon landing – the earth sure looks different than it does looking out the window flying from New York to LA. We see more. We gain a wider perspective.
One of my favorite lines that I utter when faced with a problem is – “let me go to the moon” and take a look at this problem for the deeper perspective.
Then, define the problem in one phrase.
The rest, we are pretty good at.
Hopefully, you get a chance to try this and if you like it, pass it on.
Life is tough enough without having to put up with the insults of others.
Sometimes they take the form of layoffs or firings that make people feel bad about themselves.
You’d think these companies would do everything they could to help valued employees (after all, they hired them in the first place) gain reemployment. But they don’t.
Or the non-competes that are threatened and enforced to further hamper the reemployment prospects of those let go – they’re illegal in some states and there is a movement to make them illegal everywhere.
One of the toughest things on confidence is being cut loose or even working under the threat that it might happen and in our world today it is possible if not likely.
BUT, the one thing to protect us is self-worth because so many people who were discarded by employers have found new work, new life and even better pay by not believing the narrative that they are expendable.
This is a real threat today, share if appropriate.
The most effective thing that I do to motivate college students is to put in perspective how time is so important and not to waste it. It goes like this:
A college student is one-fourth through their life expectancy based on the average age of an adult in the U.S. which is 78.
How important their 20’s are – from 20 to 35 according to Megan Jay author of The Defining Decade is when life is set for most people.
And how older people are happier than younger because they must learn to live each remaining day the best they can.
No matter your age, imagine the advantage to putting time on your side.
If you’d like to share, go right ahead.