•  An easy problem is just as difficult as a complex, more troubling one and yet we tend to worry about them equally.
• Separating every day irritations from major concerns is one quick way to notice a positive difference in anxiety.
• The gold standard for reducing worry is to remind yourself that 99% of what you worry about will never happen and often the other 1% doesn’t happen the way you feared.
• In the meantime, separate irritations from major concerns and lighten the load.

• Be the fine person you are.
• Don’t hold a vote on every move you want to make – it’s your choice and not up to anyone else.
• Social media is designed to reward people who become like others but instead of looking for social media acceptance, ask “how happy am I.”
• In spite of meds, behavioral therapy and more social anxiety persists but one way to take control is to start by reaching out to others who may also be waiting for someone to break the ice – yes, chances are they have social anxiety as well.

• Would it surprise you to know that more artists than ever are grappling with their confidence in mid-performance – that they can freeze and panic.
• All the success in the world does not prevent any of us from faltering in mid-flight next time we’re up.
• Waiting for confidence to return is not an option.
• Confidence is a decision not a feeling — we make to go on, face adversity, overcome anxiety and finish strong.

• You know how great you are when you have failed and gotten up more than once.
• The greatest accomplishment is not succeeding on the first try but persevering until you do.
• Or as author Stephen King puts it “the scariest moment is always just before you start.”

• You could say, “Will you help me?” but believe it or not the response rate is not always that impressive or enthusiastic.
• Better yet ask “Will you be a helper?” research shows that questions gets a better response.
• The reason this is a key element to winning the cooperation of people around you (at home and at work) is because worded as a noun, it makes the other person feel more powerful.

• Criticism no matter how good or correct always backfires which is why it is better left unsaid.
• To pushback against unwanted and hurtful criticism make your first reaction one of self-appreciation.
• While they are condemning or complaining about something you did, teach yourself to hear your voice over theirs in your head.
• You are the authority on you – criticism from others is just an opinion not the truth, keep that straight and you’ll always put it in the right place – out of your mind.

• It’s bad enough that others try to tear people down with criticism but why help them destroy you?
• The person who can’t advocate for themselves doesn’t need enemies.
• Believe in yourself and others will follow.
• Self-doubt is the real enemy.

• The risk of not trying comes with the greater risk of never knowing

•  Alpine skiing athlete Alice Merryweather who was forced to sit out the Olympics because of injury has struggled with fear.
• “I used to try to just ignore it. And it turns out that doesn’t work very well.  Trying not to think about something tends to make me think about it more. And so I have worked with a sports psychologist who has helped me kind of mindfully choose to accept those thoughts and just not make them a priority.”
• Blocking out fear rarely works – it lurks in the mind – just don’t give it a lot of space.

• We rate the commercials and have an opinion about the halftime, what about a motivational quote to take away from Sunday’s game?
• Only one team wins the Super Bowl.
• A first runner-up is not chosen the winner.
• The obsession with winning is misdirected – it should be an obsession with putting our best “on the field”.
• Football coaching legend Vince Lombardi who the Super Bowl trophy is named after had it right when he said “”WINNING is not everything–but making the EFFORT to win is.”

• Adele, Beyoncé, Katy Perry, Harry Stiles, Jennifer Lawrence and Emma Watson are among the many performers who deal with performance anxiety so we’re not alone when it’s our turn to “be on”.
• Confidence is not a feeling, it’s a commitment that your time, effort and life is worth you being the first to believe in yourself.
• When looking for someone to believe in you, gaze first at the mirror.
• Butterflies are actually good when you get them to fly in formation – it means we care and that we’ve got them under control.

• You’re never alone when you stand up for yourself.

• Young people especially seem to feel that when something is wrong, it is their fault.
• Amazing how when things are bad, we are programmed to blame ourselves but when things go well, we shake it off.
• Blame is useless – it doesn’t work when directed at others no matter how merited one thinks it is and it is among the most dangerous things we can do to ourselves.
• When things go wrong, fix them and when they go right repeat them over and over on a recurring loop in your brain.
• Blaming does not motivate anyone to be better.

• When the Kansas City Chiefs won their playoff game against the Buffalo Bills in an exciting last-minute climax, Chief’s quarterback Patrick Mahomes stopped celebrating with his team to cross the field and hug and console his opponent Josh Allen who was spectacular in the game.
• Hugs are not always physical – they can be pep talks or expressions of pride, confidence or support you have in another person.
• A hug can simply be lending an ear to one in need of a listener.
• But a hug starts by sharing your good fortune or a gift that you have with another without expectations of getting something in return.
• “Hugs” whether physical or verbal always involve two people with their arms and ears wide open.

• According to research, people feel worse in a crowd – if a friend is shaking in fear, the calmest person may start shaking.
• Courage is also contagious – watch someone do something brave and others will jump in.
• That happened recently when a woman got her leg caught under her car when failing to put it in park as she exited.
• A group of courageous people lifted the car allowing the woman to be pulled out – she survived with injuries, but survived.
• How we think matters – if we live in fear, we will assuredly spread it to others (and vice versa) but if we emphasize our courage, not fear, we spread it to others and they to us.

• My friend, the talented morning show personality Jerry Puffer told me he once worked for a program director who wanted one GREAT show from him a week, a few more good ones and some wiggle room for an off day.
• When we aim high, we accomplish more.
• To have that great day, it requires the belief that no person can be perfect every day but they can sure try.
• When presented like this, most people will up their game and say “yeah, I CAN do that”.

• Politicians get elected by selling the voters change but most people fear change – what they want is better.
• New rules, new bosses, new routines and new people in your life can add to the anxiety of not knowing what the future brings.
• “When you’re finished changing, you’re finished” said Ben Franklin.
• Think back to changes in your life – not all of them were bad, in fact most were good or needed to happen.
• The strong aren’t best suited to survive, it’s the ones who can best manage change who are.

• For all the problems we have this day, it is not today that is making us anxious.
• It’s what happened yesterday and the day before.
• And the fear of tomorrow.
• Now is the safest place to be.

“Everyone has inside of him a piece of good news. The good news is that you don’t know how great you can be! How much you can love! What you can accomplish! And what your potential is!” – Anne Frank

• It doesn’t take a major retooling of the fine person we are to become better.
• It’s about remembering (and not forgetting) the power we have to exceed even our own expectations.
• Never forget your own power.

• Rarely alone, often online and increasingly lonely according to a recent Wall Street Journal article about middle age moms that is applicable to all.
• Social media has both helped and hurt with dealing with burnout and loneliness during covid.
• Become an organizer and help others return to a normal life – walking, meeting, socializing in person.
• Using social media increases loneliness – here’s an Italian study.
• Staying busy, remaining positive and owning a problem that is in search of a solution is a strong way to relieve the pain of burnout and loneliness.