• As a radio program director, I always advised my airstaff to constantly be in forward motion – that is, when a song is over move on to what’s next because it creates momentum and anticipation.
• You don’t go back to generate enthusiasm, you go forward which has strong applications in other areas of life.
• Living in the present is a proven formula to be happy and looking forward is the chief way to plan ahead.

• It’s rarely what you say or how likeable you are that wins new friends.
• It’s the way they make you feel about yourself.
• Listening to others and asking questions (not talking about yourself) is the first step in making people feel good in your presence.

If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours.
— Dolly Parton

• Without one word spoken, a smile can make your inner power grow. 
• The ability to smile almost always elicits a positive reaction in return (and yes, it works with a mask on because your eyes tell the story of approval and acceptance). 
• You’ve given yourself a gift as well – smiling at others upgrades your mood instantly.

• One of my favorite authors is Amit Sood, MD, the former Mayo Clinic professor of medicine who wrote a guide to stress-free living
• “When you stop judging others, you feel better about yourself and less judged by them.”
• “Ask yourself: Is it really wrong? None of the 88 keys in a piano is wrong. Each key plays a unique tone that sounds perfect if played well and in the right place within the concerto.  Within limits, try to see others’ behaviors as different tones.”
• “A tone that doesn’t sound right in your song isn’t a bad tone. Perhaps you didn’t play it well or it doesn’t fit in your music.”

• My NYU students and I have a deal – they turn their phones and devices off during each one hour and forty-minute class to focus on discussions and I allow them to leave the room (without dirty looks or any form of chastisement) to check their messages if they like during class.
• The majority stay seated, perhaps 20% at most check their phones or use the bathrooms.
• And when I asked them this past week how difficult it is to sit there and not look at their phones, the typical response was they liked it.
• People know too much connectivity breeds distraction so the way to win the battle is to make phone use a win-win.

• Take all the successes of the past week – great and small, throw in some winners from the past month and year and replay them over and over instead of rerunning everything you perceived (or others have told you) you are doing wrong.
• If you don’t think this is possible, it is exactly what most of us do with our faults.
• We have no problem knowing what they are and yet we make them the soundtrack of our inner thoughts.
• Eliminate the negatives, accentuate the positives.
• If you have trouble, put your victories on your phone or digital device and scroll through them as a reminder that you have confidence in reserve.

• Many people are more concerned with being liked by others and one reason for this is the proliferation of social media which emphasizes “friends’, “likes” and “follows”.
• Being liked by others starts with liking yourself – if you can’t like you, how can you ask someone else to?
• And there’s always lots to like because we’re not just made up of faults and inadequacies pointed out by others, we’ve got our strengths and we should at least give them equal time in our mind.
• Act like the person you want to become and others will stand in admiration.

• Most people are waiting for you to be first to reach out and break the ice – be that person.
• Someone new, a person you may have neglected or to repair a relationship that is worth reigniting.
• Believe it or not in a classroom of students, most never meet more than one or two people and not even that if they take the class with a friend.
• Break the ice because the rewards outweigh the risks.

• “Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself” – Robert Frost

• One of my students asked me how I got into television and radio and during our chat  I confessed that I was very shy as a child – a fact I rarely talk about because people who know me today laugh when I say it.
• I told her that I rehearsed in my mind over and over again what I wished I could do someday on camera and in front of a mic.
• One day, those opportunities arrived and I was more than ready which brought me to my point.
• Some of the most significant progress is made in private when we are liberated from the expectations of others and free to be ourselves.
• “I restore myself when I am alone. A career is born in public – talent in privacy” – Marilyn Monroe.

•  An easy problem is just as difficult as a complex, more troubling one and yet we tend to worry about them equally.
• Separating every day irritations from major concerns is one quick way to notice a positive difference in anxiety.
• The gold standard for reducing worry is to remind yourself that 99% of what you worry about will never happen and often the other 1% doesn’t happen the way you feared.
• In the meantime, separate irritations from major concerns and lighten the load.

• Be the fine person you are.
• Don’t hold a vote on every move you want to make – it’s your choice and not up to anyone else.
• Social media is designed to reward people who become like others but instead of looking for social media acceptance, ask “how happy am I.”
• In spite of meds, behavioral therapy and more social anxiety persists but one way to take control is to start by reaching out to others who may also be waiting for someone to break the ice – yes, chances are they have social anxiety as well.

• Would it surprise you to know that more artists than ever are grappling with their confidence in mid-performance – that they can freeze and panic.
• All the success in the world does not prevent any of us from faltering in mid-flight next time we’re up.
• Waiting for confidence to return is not an option.
• Confidence is a decision not a feeling — we make to go on, face adversity, overcome anxiety and finish strong.

• You know how great you are when you have failed and gotten up more than once.
• The greatest accomplishment is not succeeding on the first try but persevering until you do.
• Or as author Stephen King puts it “the scariest moment is always just before you start.”

• You could say, “Will you help me?” but believe it or not the response rate is not always that impressive or enthusiastic.
• Better yet ask “Will you be a helper?” research shows that questions gets a better response.
• The reason this is a key element to winning the cooperation of people around you (at home and at work) is because worded as a noun, it makes the other person feel more powerful.

• Criticism no matter how good or correct always backfires which is why it is better left unsaid.
• To pushback against unwanted and hurtful criticism make your first reaction one of self-appreciation.
• While they are condemning or complaining about something you did, teach yourself to hear your voice over theirs in your head.
• You are the authority on you – criticism from others is just an opinion not the truth, keep that straight and you’ll always put it in the right place – out of your mind.

• It’s bad enough that others try to tear people down with criticism but why help them destroy you?
• The person who can’t advocate for themselves doesn’t need enemies.
• Believe in yourself and others will follow.
• Self-doubt is the real enemy.

• The risk of not trying comes with the greater risk of never knowing

•  Alpine skiing athlete Alice Merryweather who was forced to sit out the Olympics because of injury has struggled with fear.
• “I used to try to just ignore it. And it turns out that doesn’t work very well.  Trying not to think about something tends to make me think about it more. And so I have worked with a sports psychologist who has helped me kind of mindfully choose to accept those thoughts and just not make them a priority.”
• Blocking out fear rarely works – it lurks in the mind – just don’t give it a lot of space.

• We rate the commercials and have an opinion about the halftime, what about a motivational quote to take away from Sunday’s game?
• Only one team wins the Super Bowl.
• A first runner-up is not chosen the winner.
• The obsession with winning is misdirected – it should be an obsession with putting our best “on the field”.
• Football coaching legend Vince Lombardi who the Super Bowl trophy is named after had it right when he said “”WINNING is not everything–but making the EFFORT to win is.”