Hope.

When we give ourselves or others in our life hope, we make them happier.

It’s not solving everyone’s problems that cheers people up and if it does, that feeling doesn’t seem to last long.

Today, if you want to lift someone’s spirits, think about a sincere way to give them hope.

Cancer survivors live not only through the miracle of modern medicine but because of the hope that they will recover and live more of life.

Hope.

When a couple breaks up it seems like the end of the world until they finally believe that there is still someone in the world who is waiting to meet them.

Hope.

Ironically, succeeding at that which we want is often not as exciting as hoping that we will get what we want and life will be better.

This means we can give ourselves the gift of hope every day and become empowered to listen to others and look for ways to give them hope as well.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

There is only one reason any person becomes disappointed.

It’s when we let our expectations grow larger than our motivation.

I should have gotten that promotion.

I can’t meet the right person.

I was really looking forward to this weekend and now our plans are cancelled. 

Stay motivated to succeed, to be enriched by friendships and rewarded for hard work but don’t expect it.

Disappointment comes from anticipation.

Work toward what you want in the present, the only place it cannot disappoint.

It is the future that is not ours to anticipate no matter how hard we try.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Life comes with obnoxious people but letting them ruin your day, your life or career is not necessary.

There are five ways to deal with a contemptible person.

1. Ignore them.
2. Don’t reply quickly to anything they say.
3. Prove them wrong but say it indirectly to avoid further confrontation.
4. Define your boundaries beyond which you will speak up and stop the bullying.
5. Get them out of your life (and that includes family members).

No one has to suffer a bully unless they are prepared to continue losing their self-respect.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Taking on more responsibility and the anxiety that goes with it is no way to become more productive.

If you try to do two or three things on the way to more productivity it will not be as effective as deciding on one thing then committing everything you have to it.

Even then, when feeling overwhelmed, slow down.

Counterintuitive?

Maybe, but working faster is not as effective as working better.

Often teams assign more than one thing for participants to handle at one time.  What brings more productivity is to winnow down to the one thing that is most important at this moment, this meeting, this virtual gathering.

Once completed, the results will likely be better and you can go through another list of tasks or projects that are important.

The most productive people are often the ones who do less but are more focused on what really matters.

Just assigning work is a wish list that never comes true.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

The apology no one can resist is sincere not manipulative.

Starts with the specific thing you are sorry for.

Contains a reparation for it or promise to fix the problem.

“It’s been bothering me that I have excluded you from socializing with our friends.  I could have invited you to celebrate with our family and didn’t for which I am very sorry.  In the future, may I invite you to more social events that are with our friends or family?  I’d like that.”

I’m sorry is not embarrassing, it is empowering.

It shows we have a heart, a conscience and a hidden strength to take action to do the right thing.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Everyone wants to be empowered, but the path toward empowerment is often more emotional than meaningful.

Strength, confidence … more control over your life.

Empowerment doesn’t come from saying it.

You can’t start today and vow that you will seek to become more empowered.

Unless and ironically, you take the focus off of you.

Helping others become stronger makes you stronger.

The mother who teaches her children that to help others win, dream big, overcome adversity and accomplish their goals retrains the brain to turning words into action for her as well.

Are words better than actions?

Make empowerment an action word to unlock the strength you have been seeking.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore? Unsubscribe below.

It’s hard enough to be a good listener let alone listen for the other side of silence.

What a person is not saying – holding back, failing to or choosing to not communicate.

Often, the other side of silence is worth listening for because it can be more reliable than words.

Words can disappoint because people sometimes feel they have to say things in a certain way.  Or, they may be uncomfortable with a topic and what they say really doesn’t match with what they mean.

The employer who says one thing and means another.

The friend or loved one who tries too hard to tell us what we want to hear.

To listen for the other side of silence requires being willing to ask a few questions, not be judgmental or argumentative when you hear words you may not like.

Effective communication between two people begins when they probe for meaning that may not first come out in words.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

If you please … 

May I …

Thank you …

I appreciate you (with the reason why) …

I’m sorry …

In a world bombarded by rudeness and poor choices of words online and in social media, we still have the power to change attitudes by the careful choice of our own words.

We’re not always victims of bullies and self-absorption.  We can change the dynamic with a few well-chosen words.

What are your power words?

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

When someone is fired from a job, it is not uncommon to hear that the public explanation is to spend more time with their family.

When they get a new job, does that mean that they have spent enough time with the family?

More time is not what most family members really want.

More time focused on them is all they really ask.

All the family days don’t always add up to 30 minutes intently listening to each other in real time.

What seems like a difficult goal – spending more time with the people we love – is actually as easy as putting aside distractions and showing a heap of person centered interest in those close to us.

A walk together without a phone.

A talk without having to weigh in on your take for everything you hear.

A respite of fun.

Exercising.

Life does not have to be a big production.

Just a lot of little moments together.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Kids as young as 13 are being treated for mobile phone addiction.

Parents who have used the phone by taking it away for “bad behavior” are finding their children reacting the same way an addict would if they could no longer get access to drugs.

Here’s what we are learning from the reSTART Life Center near Seattle, the only known treatment center for mobile phone addiction in the U.S.

Explore the world beyond the screen.

Set a good example.  Parents increasingly make their phones a centerpiece of their lives and children pick this up early.

Turn off tech. 

Tech is a tool not a lifestyle. 

Remember who is supporting this habit by paying for the cellphone and its monthly bills and then be a parent. 

For adults, the same rules apply.

The phone is like a dopamine pump that is why we cannot put it down.  Why we hold it in our hands too often and check it far too much – an average of 74 times a day.

Best cure:  for every minute of digital use, balance it with an equal minute of in-person or audio contact with another person.

Balance saves the day.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Look at this video.

Not looking where we’re going or driving is having negative impacts on those doing it and those around us.

There is one sure way to put an end to living a distracted life.

Put cellphones in their place and use them as tools, not devices that draw us deeper into the black holes of social media and the world of apps that interfere from living in the present.

This woman is one of many each day who are getting hurt because she is distracted.

We can also be hurt psychologically and emotionally in being that person even if we haven’t yet had an accident.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore? Unsubscribe below.

It’s okay to be selfish in forgiveness — do it for yourself.

Indulge imperfections – no one is perfect.

Forgive before others seek it.

Seek forgiveness when it is due you.

Try to understand other’s actions.

Forgive gracefully without placing a burden on the forgiven.

Forgiving does not mean forgetting and it does not mean continuing to put up with abuse.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

I grew up living next door to an amazing neighbor who just turned 93 years young.

I say young because she is unlike a lot of people many decades younger.

She drove until she was 89.

Lives in a retirement community now but not assisted living and told me she never looks back to miss the past.  She is blessed with good health or maybe her good health was a byproduct of how she lived.

Her advice:

Go with change.

Live with no regrets.

I told her I wanted to be her best student until it gets into my thick head to never look back, only ahead.

And coming from a 93-year-old, she is reminding all us that she and we have a lot yet to look forward to.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

A recent study in the UK found that 35 is the age at which men feel loneliest.

9% of them said they have no friends at all.

Loneliness appears to be growing in all age groups and all countries.

A lack of face-to-face contact or voice contact is contributing to loneliness that many people don’t even fully realize they have.

It is hard to be lonely when we reach out to others.

Help someone else.

Break the ice, be first to converse.

Phone, don’t post or email.

Be a good friend to make a new friend.

Here is a low risk way to get started:  the first 20 people you see each day starting at home, with associates at work or even people you don’t know look them in the eye and say silently “have a good day”.  Non-verbal affirmations convey safety and friendliness.

Even if others don’t outwardly respond, you will feel better.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Dr. Amit Sood reminds us the person who can share their success with you without envy is your friend.

You will only have a few of these special friends in a lifetime.

We tend to limit our compassion to only a few people who are meaningful to us and connected to us.  Often they are genetically connected.

But everybody is your family.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

The only way to gain control is to give up control.

This does not mean have no opinion or to agree with things you don’t believe in.

Let go of having to have your way even after you articulate it.

Practice giving up control by letting someone else pick the restaurant, get their way on a project or have their preference if possible with your calendar.

No one trait is shared by more people than the desire to have more control over their lives, their friendships and the way other people live their lives.

The epidemic of anxiety in people is directly tied to spending too much time trying to control outcomes.

If you consciously try not to be in control, you will live – probably be happier – and almost certainly shed anxiety that comes with having to spend so much time getting your way after you have your say.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore? Unsubscribe below.

Social media is becoming a misnomer.

It is anti-social media when conducted in the presence of other people or instead of interacting with others.

This is an epidemic that is being at the very least allowed by parents who have succumbed to their children’s peer pressure by enabling the overuse of social media.

Facebook skews older.

Instagram is like a vanity plate for many users depicting a life of dreams or excesses rather than reality.  But it can also be fun and creative.

SnapChat is for the young who want to express themselves in a short audio or video clip and then have it disappear.

When social media interferes with living in the now 100% focused on the person you are with or activity you are involved in, then there is a worrisome component of social media addiction that exists.

Step 1 – Spend as much time focused on the here and now as you spend on social media.

Step 2 – Start new friendships outside of social media and conduct them predominantly face-to-face. 

Step 3 – Address the anxiety that is being generated by witnessing other people’s “better” lives on social media.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

1. Live in the now 100% focused on the person you are with face-to-face.
2. Know when to put away your phone.
3. Don’t chase the butterfly of happiness but be ready for it when it lands near you.
4. Changing people is the prescription for unhappiness – yours! 
5. The person who realizes that it is not about them will be blessed with an abundance of friends.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

“When you go out in the world, look for the job you would take if you didn’t need the money.”

Earning a living is important.  There are bills and loans to pay.

But using this as an excuse for spending your life in a job that doesn’t dazzle you is self-destructive.

Sometimes you do things to get by but never to avoid following your dreams.

Without hope, there are no dreams.

Without dreams, there is no hope.

It’s intriguing that the richest people on earth work to be the best not the richest.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

When we return home from a day at work, we often carry that day’s problems with us into the relationships we care about most.

Pause at the door or in the car before getting out.

Pretend that you have been away from your spouse and kids for 2 weeks.

Then go in and greet them as if you haven’t seen them in 2 weeks.

Repeat daily.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore? Unsubscribe below.