This is less complicated than it sounds and you’re hearing this from a guy who made his living in the communications business.
Talking is not listening.
Listening is the act of being 100% present with what another person is saying.
Not thinking about your next response.
Not necessarily sharing your parallel experience because most people want to be heard.
As a professor I learned quickly that no matter how expert I thought I was on the subject matter, it was easier to get students engaged by listening to them.
My best friend was such a good listener that when he was interrupted – say, by a waiter or waitress looking to top off our coffees – I would forget where I left off, but he never did.
And he proudly, said “When you speak, I listen”.
The art of active listening in real time begins not when we shut our mouths but when we open our minds to what is being shared.
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