Predicting Today’s Mood

We believe AccuWeather even when they are wrong.

Research shows that out of 100 things that will happen to you and me today, only 4 will could be considered bad.

Even the best weather forecast can’t promise that accuracy.

Researchers say we have a right to expect much better than bad.

Our digital world makes us obsess over fearing the future even though brain surgeons will tell you that 96% of everything that happens to you today will be good.

Instead of dreading something bad there is real evidence that it’s the other way around and that could improve a lot of moods.

Outing Doubt

After he made the second bogey last Saturday, Brian Harman says “a guy said Harman you don’t have the stones for this.  That helped.  It helped me snap back into ‘I’m good enough to do this.  I’m going to do this”.

He went on to win his first major at of all places The British Open.

If you don’t believe in yourself, you can’t expect anyone else to.

And when others question your ability, it’s the perfect time to make sure you don’t.

If others doubt, show them what you’re all about.

Optimism

The national lottery jackpot hit $1 billion again recently and I can prove that everyone who had a ticket waiting for the results thought they were going to win.

Why?

They paid money to bet on it even with odds that are so minute.

The odds of claiming the jackpot in a Powerball drawing are 1 in 292.2 million.  To put this in perspective, you have a: 1 in 1,222,000 chance of death or injury from lightning in a given year and 1 in 57,825 chance of dying from a hornet, wasp, or bee sting during your lifetime.

Imagine if we bet on ourselves no matter how daunting the odds.

Influencers

Why are so many of us looking to influencers in the digital age?

We have thought leaders and trendsetters but a paid influencer gets far too much sway.

Be the main influencer in your life – your life is not an election or popularity contest, it is a piece of art created on a canvas of your choosing.  You choose the colors.

Just because someone is paid to make something popular, it is worth nothing to anyone looking to live a life of authenticity without regard to whatever anyone else thinks.

It’s not only young people who outsource their likes to influencers, people of all ages do.

Look to yourself first.

When Things Go Bad

When things are bad, look to the helpers.

Duane Hawkins has been cutting hair in Rochester, MN for 40 years until he had to face kidney cancer again after having one kidney removed in 2013.

This time, his grateful customers contributed money to help him pay the rent on his shop while he has surgery and takes treatment.

One of our readers, Townsquare’s air personality Jerry Puffer, also a Mayo Clinic frequent visitor who has known Hawkins for decades is featured in this short video.

In an age of rage and disconnected relationships, this is how I channeled my gratitude this morning.

Hope you like it.

Being Better Understood

Try to understand others before you expect them to understand you.

They probably don’t “get” you because you don’t get them.

Think about their limitations and fears.

Look at it like this:  they are attempting to defend themselves more than hurt you.

Some common ground can get reached.

And you don’t have to agree.

“Tell me what you’re thinking” is a disarming way to gain insight into others and often leads to a better understanding of what you feel.

We know what doesn’t work:  arguments, fights, insults, hurt, talking past each other.

Being better understood starts with making sure the word “you” is among the first words you say.

Angry Drivers

I let a driver onto the road in front of me when no one else would car-after-car and in return there was no wave, thumbs up or even a look in my direction.

Post-Covid driving is crazy – cars cutting in and out just to gain a few hundred yards, last minute exits on interstates, driving distracted near you and driving too close to your car to get you to drive faster even when you’re exceeding the speed limit.

I was hit going into the Holland Tunnel on my way out of New York City and when I got out of my vehicle, the cause of the accident was still on his phone texting – and yes, he said I hit him even though he hit me from behind.

Other people’s shortcomings are not an excuse to become like them.

The best response is to be the driver you want to be and steer away from trouble.

This reminds me of what happiness doctor Amit Sood does when he looks upon others and wishes them well in his mind so a bad driver can’t make one out of you.

Embracing Boredom

Our minds go astray when we’re bored – a good thing because it prompts us to be more creative and look for new things.

87% of teenagers in the U.S. have a smartphone and presumably are on social media looking to scratch the itch of FOMO (fear of missing out).

The Academy of Management Studies did this experiment:

It drove its subjects into boredom by asking them to sort beans by color but a second group was given a less boring task.

Wouldn’t you know the bored out of their mind bean counters came up with better ideas when given their next assignment which was to come up with good excuses for tardiness.

I used to walk everywhere when I was a kid – I left my Walkman home and just fed my imagination which today is pretty healthy.

Boredom has its benefits.  It stimulates us into creativity.

Here’s that study.

Music Therapy & Dementia

Okay, I am a music business professor and I don’t have to be convinced of the many benefits of music therapy, but listen to this.

Music therapy is a potential intervention for cognition of Alzheimer’s Disease according to a study in the National Library of Medicine.

It turns out doing crossword puzzles is not the only way to fend off age related dementia.

Music therapy can be considered a non-pharmacological adjunct to reducing cognitive decline and “combination method with dance, art, video game, physical exercise, and so on is excitingly helpful. We should make a therapeutic strategy individually according to preference and physical endurance of every patient”.

Among the variations:  singing songs, listening to music to reduce mood symptoms and behavior disorders.  Here’s the study.

Combining music therapy with dance, physical exercise, video game, art and other things

is yet another benefit of music therapy that I plan to share with my NYU music business stress class this fall because the benefits are accrued at any age.

Music is not only the soundtrack of our lives; it is life itself.

The Marshmallow Test

Stanford psychologist Walter Mischel offered a choice of a marshmallow or pretzel stick to a child (their preference) and then left the room for 15 minutes.

In follow-up studies (SAT scores, educational attainment, body mass and other things), children who could wait longer and delay gratification were shown to have better life outcomes.

Today we’re bombarded with FOMO (fear of missing out), attention addictions and relationship challenges caused by digital devices.

The takeaway is the more we can learn to delay gratification, the happier we are.

If you measure happiness like billionaire Ray Dalio of Bridgewater hedge fund, then his words may resonate with you:

“Once you realize that deferred gratification will improve you, you begin to count and say how many days, months, weeks, or years can I live if I don’t spend the money I have coming in”.

The ability to defer gratification is directly associated with happiness and financial success.