Nothing helps boost positive feelings more than when things are going right.

And nothing makes us doubt ourselves more than when things go wrong.

The trick is to build confidence when you need it most not to wait for things to get better on their own.

Keep a list of accomplishments on your phone notes  

Review the list many times during the day (it’s right on your phone)

Include little things – in fact, start with little things

Assume you will succeed not fail

Take time to discard any negative comments from others

Trying and not quitting is a big success – put it on the list

For every criticism, add a compliment – always balance them

Never attack yourself

Remember there is no such thing as constructive criticism 

To build confidence it is first important to show love and respect for yourself.

And the most important thing:

Don’t look for confidence in the words of others.  

Your confidence is your responsibility.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Nothing hurts more or more deeply than self-doubt.

When the simple belief that we can do it is attacked by all the reasons we can’t.

It’s one thing for other people to doubt.

It’s fatal to happiness when we doubt ourselves.

Nothing worth doing is worth doubting.

Assume a virtue if you have it not as Shakespeare said.

Don’t look elsewhere for the belief in yourself.

If you don’t have it, they won’t have it for you.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Money.

Relationships.

Work.

Not enough time.

These are four of the biggest anxiety producers.

Stress is cumulative.  It gets worse as we obsess over it.

An effective way to stop stress in its tracks once it starts occurring is to repeat this mantra often:

99% of the time what we worry about never happens.

The worry always causes more anxiety than what is feared.

Manage stress by putting it in its place.

Perception is scarier than reality.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

When they go low, you go high.

But what about when they keep going low?

Another approach is when they go low you ignore them.

It’s like wearing a shirt that has a big button on it that says PUSH.

There are times when an honest response is the right thing to do.

And when the insults keep coming, keep cutting off the oxygen of the verbal abuser.

They will soon look for someone else’s buttons to push.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

It took 5 years.

Many surgeries.

Rehabilitation.

Dealing with personal issues.

Living with self-doubt.

But on Sunday, September 23^rd, Tiger Woods won his first PGA victory.

Here’s the thing.

Losing is an ugly gift that reminds us how badly we want to win.

The tougher it is, the more it hurts, the more that it requires us to double down and not give up, losing in a rehearsal for winning that cannot be denied.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Criticism is never constructive.

And harsh criticism is abusive behavior.

Even in sports, the coach who gets away with harsh criticism as a motivator is often out of work a year or two later.   Hurtful feelings are a lousy motivator.

Don’t listen – walk away, end the conversation.

There is a difference from improving and being devastated.  Improving is your decision no one else’s.

Being defensive means the abuser won.

Another reason not to listen.  The first time you defend yourself, you won’t change anything but you will feel worse.

No one gets direct access to your psyche.

Not even for compliments.  Our brains are sensitive areas that control the way we feel about ourselves.  Letting anyone have direct access to our inner most and fragile state of mind is flirting with danger.

If it is an employer who harshly criticizes, double down on looking for new work. 

The best way to avenge such negative and hurtful behavior is to do something positive to finding a less toxic workplace.

Never criticize yourself.

Nothing is harsher or more damaging than an insult uttered by you to yourself.

We are responsible for how we think about ourselves – never outsource it to anyone else especially those close to you.

Concentrate on the good, not the bad.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Facebook has a low bar – anyone can friend anyone else.

There are lots of great acquaintances but few true friends.

A friend is your best listener. 

If they talk about themselves, they will never be a true friend.

Friends never take, they always give.

They don’t sell you something, invite you to parties in place of asking what they can do for you not what you can do for them.

True friends don’t have to be similar to you, but they must share similar values. 

Opposites attract except for values.

A friend never judges. 

That would be hurtful.

A friend never gives advice.

True friends know what we started out with above – a friend is your best listener.

A true friend is never jealous.

If you have a few true friends, they should be getting the majority of your time and effort in staying connected.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Why do we talk ourselves down?  Or allow others to do it?

We feed ourselves to remain healthy and we must also feed our psyches to develop and maintain a healthy positive attitude.

Here’s a sample power talk:

I care about others. 

I am fair and open-minded.

I can say I’m sorry quickly and emphatically.

I can name accomplishments I have achieved without hesitation. 

I admit mistakes, work on them but don’t fixate on the negative.

I can name 10 things I like about myself. 

I can name 5 people who I am grateful for and why.

I will never give up.

I listen not just talk.

I will no longer criticize myself as criticism is not constructive in any way.

By repeating a customized power talk every day – updating it and augmenting it – we remind ourselves of the difference between a pep talk and power talk.

A pep talk can be fleeting and superficial.

A power talk is a reminder of the fine person that we are.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Dreams without plans are delusions.

Dreams come true when there is a path to making them happen.

Want to change careers?   

Make new friends? 

Change your lifestyle?

Improve your health?

Pursue your passion? 

Step 1 – Know yourself.  What specifically do you seek? 

Step 2 – Design a road map to get to your specific goal. 

Step 3 – Who can be of help – seek their advice not their consent.

Step 4 – Know when to give up and when to persist.

Here’s how to know.

If you can take one defeat after the other and still work through your discouragement, you are eventually going to realize your dream.

If you are discouraged, tired, no longer sure – you have still accomplished something important.

To know what you want is as important as knowing what you don’t want.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

The harder people try to feel stronger and more empowered – the less it seems to work.

Talk is just talk.

And taking action can sometimes be viewed as bullying or aggressive behavior.

Here’s the secret to becoming more powerful.

Be the person who gives away their power.

People are attracted to strong people who make others stronger as well.

Let someone else make the decision you were going to make.

Encourage others to recommend to you the best course of action (instead of being the one to dictate or strongly influence it).

Give the gift of your time (nothing is more appreciated than a person who is willing to listen). 

Find ways to give away your power – if you are the boss, supervise as if you were still the person that works for you.

Forgive.

Encourage.

And give credit that might belong to you to other deserving people.

I know a person who gave away most every award he received by accepting it and giving it to the person who helped him win that award.

Powerful people live a life of giving away their power not fighting for it.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.

Not about you.

What’s in it for them?

Companies fail to win cooperation because they talk about only what they want not shared goals and motivations.

Some radio industry CEOs set records for using words like “I” and “me” even while referring to employees as “team” members during motivational “town hall” meetings.

Unhelpful words to eliminate from your vocabulary when your interest is gaining cooperation …

Team (when referring to the corporate kind) 

I 

Me

The most helpful word …

You 

When others see what’s in it for them, they are more likely to help you get what you want.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

You help build someone up not run them down.

When people put down others, what they say is best dismissed from your mind.

The longer it lingers, the more damage the insult does.

People have a way of remembering and repeating negative input while dismissing the positive.

Think of your brain as a special place that not everyone is allowed to have direct access to.   

You decide what gets in and what doesn’t.  

No one gets to say things that you don’t allow – you’re in control as you should be after all, it is your brain. 

So when something hurtful is said, you are the firewall that either lets it ruminate and stew or rejects it outright.

The master of human relations Dale Carnegie says “don’t criticize” — period.  There is nothing good that comes from criticizing yourself or others.

Asking for positive criticism is actually asking to be put down.

There is no such thing as positive criticism.

How can I be better?  That’s the best and healthiest way toward growth.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

A sense of impending doom.

The need to escape.

Hyperventilation.

Rapid heartbeat.

Sweaty palms.

Just some of the symptoms for a panic attack that may last anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour or more.

Focus on breathing — exhaling and inhaling very slowly.  Help someone else by doing this with them.

Give yourself space.  Help others by letting them know you do not want help right now.

Concentrate on being and feeling safe.  If you help someone having a panic attack remind them you are “here for them”.

Panic attacks are very common in the interconnected world in which we live.

They can’t be argued away.

And panic attacks are no reason to be shamed.

Help by comforting someone having an attack not arguing with them or lecturing.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Elon Musk is miserable these days.

The founder of SpaceX and Tesla should have it all but he speaks publicly of depression, a nervous breakdown and the inability to sleep.

Happiness comes from realizing how fortunate you are.

A grateful person is rarely unhappy.

They find ways to see even small things – and especially small things – as reasons to be happy.

All Elon Musk’s money cannot make him happy because material things are transient flowing in and out of our lives.

Walking out of a breast care mammogram grateful for another period ahead of good health is the real currency not the amount of money in the bank.

Being poor can cause unhappiness but the pursuit of money usually causes the same feeling.

The only way to be truly rich is to be eternally grateful.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Empowerment is not bragging or exercising control over others.

We feel strong when we reach out and touch others.

Start the day by paying at least one compliment to someone else before uttering the words “I” or “me”.

Don’t look for compliments — give them. 

Compliment the person; not their looks (that’s flattery).  A compliment is only sincere when it is backed by evidence. 

Feel stronger by listening to someone else without interruption.

Let someone ahead of you in line at Starbucks.

When someone is stressed, be the one not to add to it.

When people are rude, it makes us feel angry.  But if we want to feel powerful, focusing on someone else without looking for attention in return is the first step toward empowerment.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Trust is not a feeling – it’s a decision.

Any doubts just reflect on the number of times you trusted someone only to be disappointed or hurt.

Before giving your trust, the other party must earn it.

Are they reliable?

Sensitive to your needs?

Honest, ethical – do they have a sense of fairness?

Look for the good qualities and also keep eyes wide open for the bad ones.

You wouldn’t let a person into your house who you didn’t first have good reason to believe could be trusted.  And then, you open the door.

The same applies to our lives.

Before making a conscious decision to put your trust into a person, institution or idea, make sure you feel comfortable about opening the door.

Think with your head – feel with your heart.

Not the other way around.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Happiness is positive cash flow.

Money without happiness is not worth the effort it takes to earn it and we do know through recent studies that money can only buy so much happiness.

Anything under an average of $70,000 per working couple will cause money stresses but any amount over the 50-state average of $70,000 does not make people any happier.  Not even a million a year according to the most recent poll.

These surveys reflected people who graded their happiness and then disclosed their incomes.

Money can’t buy happiness.

But a takeaway is that happiness is also worth more than money.

When planning for your financial future also include factors that lead to increased happiness.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

People who must be in control deprive themselves of the honest appreciation of others.

If they control the love, they risk never freely receiving love.

If they write the script, the ending always turns out the same.

If they control the outcome, they may miss a better solution.

If they obsessively speak for another, they are responsible for not empowering someone else.

The best way to gain control is to give up control.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

No one gets access to your subconscious.

Once said, the brain repeats what it hears.

If the comments are destructive, you are doing the damage by repeating them on a continuous loop.

The subconscious is like a recorder.

No one gets to record a message in your subconscious but you.

Even a compliment doesn’t get a pass (you record the compliments you receive).

The mind can be a powerful asset to happiness and success or it can serve to tear you down if the messages you are hearing and duplicating are damaging.

Taking charge of what gets recorded in the subconscious and not what other people say makes all the difference.

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.

Exceed expectations – yours and those of others. 

Have the heart of a servant – please others until it hurts. 

Outwork everyone else.

Turn your dreams into well thought out game plans.

On the way to getting what you want help those who help you get what they want.

Become skilled at human relations, the special skills that makes people gravitate to you and want to work with you. 

Subscribe to these Day Starters for free here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good, The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

Don’t want to get these emails anymore?  Unsubscribe below.