Everyone submits a resume when applying for work, but my USC music students learned a new way to get the interview and eventually the job.

It’s a one-sheet that will put your qualifications ahead of the best looking, most powerful resume because yours is focused on the hiring needs of the company.

1. Write 7 sentences and number them in order.  Each one has both a qualification or skill that you possess and one that your research shows the hiring company most desires.
2. Bold each of the 7 sentences.
3. Next to each bolded skill, write a second sentence (unbolded) that factually states the real experience you have to justify your claim.
4. Put your name at the top of the sheet somewhat like this “How Jerry Del Colliano Can Help Ferrari of North America”.   Email, phone number under your name.  Nothing else.

Here’s an example of 1 of the 7 items:

1. Works well with creative people and task groups. I am a Dale Carnegie instructor in human relations.

One of my students called in a panic saying that his interview was the next afternoon and he was having trouble coming up with 7 qualifications that fit the company’s perceived needs.

I said, cancel the interview.  If you don’t have the skills, you’ll know it before you get to #7.  If you do, you’ll kill at the interview.

One more thing.  Never carry more than one copy of this sheet into a face-to-face interview.  If the interviewer asks for a copy (the one you’re using to refer to), tell her/him that you were planning to leave your copy for her/him.

Most job seekers who are super qualified for a position often put themselves in with many people who are not and then it’s a crapshoot.

But if you were hiring and someone handed you an easy to read sheet with everything you’re looking for in a job candidate backed up with proof, which person would your hire?

Good luck.

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If there is one thing that people want – no, crave – it is a person focused on listening to them.

This is not just true in our self-absorbed society but was always valid.

The best listener has the most friends.

The best listener gets the best jobs.

The best listener is even confused for being the best conversationalist, which sounds odd but is often true.

Most of us have to work hard at being a good listener.

Some lucky people have it in their DNA.

But if being a better listener is a goal there is one way to get started even if listening does not come easy.

Focus on what is being said with the intention of summarizing it.

Listen, put what you’re hearing into a few short phrases and keep listening.

Listening with a purpose is the secret to becoming a better listener.

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It’s the shame of being fired even more than the lack of income that causes anxiety.

We are our jobs.

Spend more time working than anything else but sleeping (and sometimes even more than sleeping).

We are defined by the jobs we hold, the companies we work for and the people who constitute our work friends.

No one ever holds a party to celebrate losing their jobs.

No matter how much evidence there is that bad breaks like firings and layoffs almost always turn into something more positive and eventually more lucrative, we’re stuck on the feeling of shame.

To make it worse some employers fire people without respect to their feelings. Others don’t let the fired say goodbye or even pack up their own belongings – shaming moves.

When we fear for our careers focus on what makes us so valuable:

• Always be able to name the three things that make you valuable to an employer – say it out loud daily.
• Just as you should save money for a “rainy day” also save self-esteem for when you need it most.
• Do what I do – keep a file under notes on your smartphone and list every accomplishment you have with the latest on top.  Then often scroll through this list when waiting for an appointment or ending a day so you can remind yourself of specific accomplishments that you are proud of.
• Fear of the future is more damaging then what could actually happen.  Most of our fears will never be realized but reminding ourselves of what makes us valuable increases our confidence.

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Perhaps you’ve read this quote from the basketball great Michael Jordon:

“I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career.  I’ve lost almost 300 games.  26 times I have been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed.  I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life.  And that is why I succeed”.

We’ve got it all wrong.

Failure isn’t bad.

Failing means trying – it means learning and getting better.

It helps us get in touch with our determination – how badly do we want to win?

Adversity introduces us to ourselves and to those around us.

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I once followed Dick Clark in addressing the Country Music Broadcasters Convention in Nashville.

Clark was a fan favorite and hit it out of the park using video, stories and humor.

There were over 700 people in the auditorium and I don’t know whether I ever shared this before but it was one of the few times that I was concerned about doing a good job.

I stepped from backstage out into the audience to try and figure out what Clark was doing that I probably had to do.

But the more I tried to shoehorn myself into someone else’s act, the more anxious I became.

Until it hit me.

We were both invited to address this conference – Dick, as the expert in TV and music and me as the “expert” in radio.

In other words, I must have earned the right to be on stage and I needed to get that into my head.

When my turn came, I walked to the podium – glanced left, right and center to remind the audience and most importantly me that I had earned the right to be addressing this fine group.

To increase confidence, look for ways to remind yourself that you have earned the right to be the leader, the presenter, the supervisor, the highly engaged employee and it will make all the difference in the world.

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George Zimmer, the Men’s Warehouse founder known for saying “you’re going to like the way you look – I guarantee it” was shockingly fired a few years ago by his hand chosen board of directors.

One board member was even a childhood buddy.

Suddenly Zimmer was out when he vehemently opposed the merger with Jos A. Bank merger.

I’ve been there. Maybe you have, too.

Everything you worked so hard for is suddenly gone.

Since then, Zimmer started a new Internet venture Generation Tux, an online tuxedo rental business.

His new business is going gangbusters and his former business is spiraling downward.

They wouldn’t listen to Zimmer when he said do not merge with our brick and mortar competitor, Jos. A. Bank.

He was right and he still got fired.

Lessons?

• In example after example, people who succeeded have first failed (often many times). Look at failure as a rehearsal for success.
• The end is always the beginning of something new – repeat that thought over and over and do not dwell on what’s over and cannot be changed.
• Humility when on top helps save face when the bottom falls out.
• Without failure we would be tempted to continue in jobs we’ve outgrown and missed the opportunity to hit new heights.
• There is no such thing as failure – only an opportunity to succeed at something else.
• When you’re down, you get a chance once again to see who your real friends are and to value them even more.

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People who are newly in love crave the company of each other.

Longer-term relationships often become devoid of that passion, interest and warmth that came so easily in the beginning.

Marriage, children, work can take its toll.

All the marriage counselors, books and date nights out will not necessarily recapture that loving feeling.

Find novelty where there is love.

Find new ways to do things.

Put that cellphone away after checking messages and emails.

Focus on walking home a new way.

Finding a new place to eat.

Shopping for something new to wear that you’ve never owned before.

Two people who continually look for ways to find novelty where love is are able to recapture exactly how it felt when they met.

A girl tells her boyfriend:

– After our marriage I will let you kiss me where nobody else has kissed me.

– Where is that?

– In Hawaii.

Okay, it doesn’t have to be an expensive trip.

Anthropologist Helen Fisher says, “Research shows that novelty–taking risks or trying something new–can trigger the release of dopamine in the brain.  I’m not just talking about novelty in the bedroom (although that would be a good start). You can get the same effect from sampling a new type of cuisine together or riding the roller coaster at an amusement park.”

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My friend, the late dj and radio program director Jay Cook used to put a smile on his face as he turned on his mic.

And he sounded warm, friendly and got large audiences to listen and like him.

You may be the nicest person in the world but when anxiety sets in, you’re in a rush, involved in your cellphone, you don’t necessarily come off that way.

When we look at people we don’t know, we make a judgment about whether we like them, trust them, feel safe around them in a nanosecond.

Some look so sour they have that constipated look frozen on their face.

Try this today.

The next 10 people you see say, “I wish you well” to yourself as you make eye contact.  Watch what happens to them.

And be cognizant of what will happen to you — how it unlocks your goodness and kindness without ever having to say a word.

Yes, this works in a meeting.

It works in an airport terminal with people you don’t know.

And with family.

A smile may be a frown turned upside down but it is also your greatest ambassador.

No words can accomplish what a smile can do.

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Once a day, every day dedicate the same time to channel your inner gratitude.

Commuting to and from work.

Shaving (that’s my favorite).

Taking a run.

Before you say goodnight.

Who is that special person who would be happy for you if you got the promotion, got a raise and made more money than they did, had a happier outcome in a personal relationship – you get the idea – the one who would not want one penny if you won the lottery.

See the person in your mind’s eye.

Say why you are grateful for that person.

Even if you don’t get a chance to tell them over and over again, expressing gratitude silently.

Few of us wake up in the morning and say, “I feel too appreciated”.  Think about the people you care for most – and it can be the same people over and over for similar or different reasons – and take gratitude to a higher level.

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The past is a file.

You should open up, consult it and put it away. Too many open files distract us from living in the present.

The future is about hopes and dreams.

But you can’t keep planning ahead at the expense of living in the now.

Living in the present should not be as hard as it is but with open files and unfinished plans, we live in a constant state of distraction. The average person has 150 “undone tasks” at any time.

And it has been proven that the more time people spend distracted, the more anxiety, depression, attention deficit and even dementia occurs later in life.

Stop living in the past by closing open files and avoiding the mistake of living in the future that has not yet occurred.

“The present that duals with the past sacrifices the future” – Amit Sood

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